It's not me!
by Daizels
Summary: Inspired by the Coasters' song "Charlie Brown" This is a ONE-SHOT about Leo and his side-kick Piper's various "wrongdoings" in the Wilderness school. Please read and review, it's not a songfic and there is no pairings inside! Enjoy! :D


**A silly little one-shot for a silly little song, I hope you like this because I immediately thought of Leo when I heard it. I'm sorry if Leo seems a bit OoC, but this is before we met him right? So do me a favour and read this and let me know in the reviews what you thought thanks :D**

"Fe Fi Fo Fum! Here Leo Valdez comes!" Leo chanted walking into the principal's office.

"Stop your chanting and sit yourself down Valdez." The principal said glaring at him.

"Why thank you sir! I'm so glad you liked my chant." He said sitting down on the chair opposite of the principal's, Leo grabbed a pencil from the desk and started cleaning his nails.

"Stop being sassy and listen to the matter at hand." The old man's cheeks started to blow up with anger, it was only the reason that the Wilderness school was full of people like him, that he hadn't been kicked out yet.

"Yeeeees? I'm listening." He said putting his feet on the table.

"Feet off the table Valdez!"

"So, sorry. It's mahogany isn't it?" Leo said enjoying himself severely.

"Yes, it is. Now, a group of students reported smelling and seeing smoke in and coming from the auditorium."

"Aaaand? What's it got to do with me?" Of course he knew! He and Piper had been roasting marshmallows in there in break!

"You are prime suspect number one."

"Oooh! Fascinating, got any evidence?"

"Er-no."Of course not Leo had hijacked the video camera's in the auditorium.

"Then it's not me. Goodness! Why is everybody always picking on me?" Leo said walking past the fuming principal. He couldn't wait to tell Piper about this.

* * *

"VALDEZ!" They heard Coach Hedge screaming.

"Uh oh! Scram Pipes." Leo told his best friend - and partner in crime - and together they ran from the building they had just been sabotaging.

"Valdez. We both know it was you who messed with the boys gym's plumbing and electricity." The principal said, but this time Coach Hedge was standing next to him, glaring at Leo.

"And _how _is a fifteen-year-old supposed to mess with the plumbing _and _the electricity of a whole boys gym?" Leo asked looking at them innocently, but of course it had been him ! He with a little help from Piper, made all the showers switch from hot to cold every ten seconds and they also made the lights go out every time a shower turned on.

"I- uh - well..." The principal stammered.

"Then it wasn't me! And _why _is everybody always picking on me?" Leo said walking past them yet again.

"I got my eye on you cupcake." Coach Hedge said. Man that guy's got some problems.

* * *

"We've had some problems lately and guess who's the guilty one?" The principal sneered at him.

"Who me?" Leo said innocently.

"Yes, you! You're the one who's always writing on the walls! _"The Chamber of Secrets Has Been Opened, Enemies of The Heir Beware." _That has you written all over it!" The principal shouted.

"Er- actually it has _"The Chamber of Secrets" _written all over it.

"Argh! Well it's you and that McLean girl who's always messing in the halls!" He said grinning at his accomplishment.

"Got any proof?" He said laying back in the chair he was sitting on.

"No." He said defeated.

"VALDEZ!" An angry cry came through the now open door of the principal's office.

"The bloody cupcake has been shooting spit-balls at me the whole damn period! I just found him now!" Coach Hedge yelled.

"AHA!" The principal said jumping for joy.

"Well, technically it doesn't say I can't in the rule book." He said, fortunately Piper had him read the rules before hand, so he could get out of things easier.

"What?" Hedge looked bewildered. The principal ran over to his desk, grabbing a copy of the rule book flipping though it."I'm afraid he's right." The principal said looking like Christmas had been cancelled.

"Honestly! Why is everybody always picking on me?" Leo said walking out of the office again.

* * *

(Piper PoV.)

He walked into the gym (it was a combined Volleyball game today.) cool and slow. The coach glared at him, "What's up Daddy-O?"

"What!?" The coach bleated (wierd right?)

"I said what's up Daddy-O, goodness! Someone burned their cupcakes today!" Leo responded patting him on the head.

"You we're bound to get caught sometime Valdez." Piper sighed.

"WHY'S EVERYBODY ALWAYS PICKING ON ME?!" Leo screamed as the coach started chasing him with his bat, and let's just say we spent the rest of the period watching Coach Hedge chase Leo around the gym.

* * *

**Well, **w**hat did you guys think? :D**

**~Daizels**


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